There’s nothing that lends itself to more confusion than parenting. I’ve many times longed for some sort of manual to spell out the do’s and don’ts of it all.
No such luck.
So what I have a really hard time understanding is why if something is deemed potentially “dangerous†for children, why in the world is it allowed to be manufactured and sold? If you ask me, that just opens the door for confusion and, dare I say, panic (I’m kind of high-strung). Just what parents need.
I’m talking specifically about things like crib bumpers. I read this story in USA Today about a family that lost their 7-week-old son last year – a death they believe was caused by asphyxiation from his face being wedged between the crib bumper and the mattress. Child-safety advocates are calling for crib bumpers to be pulled from the shelves completely, saying the warning labels do not good. BUT, the story also says a new study refutes that there’s a connection between dozens of infant deaths, like this one, and the use of crib bumpers.
Who should we believe?
My personal feeling is that if there’s a question about whether something is safe, side with caution. Seems logical to me now. But when my babies were a few months old, it wasn’t so crystal clear. I remember feeling so torn about what was right or wrong and what things I was just being paranoid about.
In our nursery, we started with the bumpers off. Then, around 5 months old I put them on the boys’ cribs after having to maneuver a chubby baby leg out of a crib slat. I was terrified someone was going to lose a limb! (Of course, I also thought they looked cute in the room.) Then one day I walked into the babies’ room and saw little Graham with his face pressed up to the fabric and freaked out again, promptly removing the crib bumpers that, by the way, were not cheap (if I could do it all again I would not buy a bedding set … why did no one tell me this?). I decided the only thing worse than losing a limb was losing a baby. But the saga continued. I then tracked down something called a breathable bumper, which I thought was the best thing ever. They are mesh, so even if the baby puts his face against it, he can breathe. Of course reading the USA Today article, I now see these aren’t tested so they aren’t really recommended either. Turns out after all of my attempts to do the right thing, I still might have missed the mark.
Who knows. It’s sort of a no-win situation. I would prefer none of these inventions existed. That way I could save my worry for some other cause.
It isn’t just crib bumpers. The article also mentions the sleep positioners. Apparently not so safe either. I never bought one of these luckily, but it crossed my mind a few times.
And then there’s my favorite: the infant snowsuit. I’ll never forgot showing up at a one-week appointment after the babies were born and having a nurse kindly tell us that we were putting the twins in danger – and breaking car seat rules – by putting the babies in the cute little suits (it was March when we had them … still very cold, as anyone who lives around here knows.) As a new mom, I was traumatized. I had no idea. Why in the world do they sell them if they aren’t safe? When else would my newborn baby need to be in a snowsuit if not while being transported?
The rational side of me realizes that there are plenty of children out there who have survived blankets, crib bumpers, sleep positioners, snowsuits and stomach-sleeping. The results of these things aren’t always tragic. Still, I can’t help but think parents have plenty of other safe things to spend their money on.
And on a side note, yes, I have been a neglectul blogger as of late. Seems sometimes that living life gets in the way of writing about it. 